Simple Tips to Spice up Your Sex Life In 2023

Rate this post

When you add in the stresses of everyday life, like paying bills, being a parent, and doing well at work, it’s not hard to see why many people lose their libidos. Jacqueline Sherman, Ph.D., says our libido usually decreases for two reasons:

When the body releases the stress hormone cortisol, it is much harder to feel sexual desire. Stress makes our bodies tense, making it hard for some people to calm down enough to want to be sexual.

Predictability is the other reason your sexual performance may not be as good as it used to be. After a while, couples stop trying new things in bed and stick to what has worked.

This recipe can make someone feel bored and reduce their desire for sex. When we try something new and exciting, our brain releases dopamine, which makes us feel good. Dopamine is crucial to sexual behavior and can get the libido going.

Do you feel like your sex life has gotten boring, and you no longer have the urge to have sex with your partner? There are several things you can do to spice it up. Some of these things include:

Practice dirty talking

Most people like verbal seduction. Also known as dirty talk, when done right, it can take your sex life to a whole new level.

The dirty talk builds excitement about what’s to come, which is a great way to spice up your relationship.

For the best outcome, use descriptive language when describing what you’re feeling, what you want to do to your partner, or what you want them to do to you.

As much as you are talking dirty, remember you still need to be respectful.

As a rule of thumb, avoid using derogatory or demeaning language, and never say anything that could be perceived as hurtful or offensive.

You won’t be great at first, but like any skill, dirty talk takes practice to master. Don’t be afraid to try new things and learn from your experiences.

Schedule sex time

Lexx Brown-James, LMFT, a sexologist, suggests making plans to have sex. Putting a specific time on your calendar for sensual pleasure can be exciting.

People have gotten busy over the years and if both of you are always busy with work, you should highly consider scheduling sex time. You should agree on when you will have sex, then put it on the calendar.

If other people can see your calendar, use a secret code so that only you and your lover will know what it’s for.

Use toys

Sexual devices are friends, not foes. They are there to help you and make your enjoyment stronger. You should consider getting a few if, you don’t already own them.

You can use them alone or with a lover who can make the pleasure they give you even stronger.

Besides using regular dildos and plugs, you also should consider using teledildonic toys. You can control these devices remotely through an app which comes in handy at adding creativity and excitement to the bedroom. You can change how your partner feels the vibrations through an app that connects to the toy.

Some even allow you to control them while your partner is at work. You only need to agree with your partner to put on the toy then you control it from the app. As you can guess, you will have amazing sex when your partner comes back from work excited after teasing them the entire day.

Try visual aids

Whether you watch, listen to, or read erotica, it can help you get more excited and remind you of your sexual fantasies. You don’t have to act on those fantasies; you can use them to get excited.

The beauty is that you don’t need to buy anything. You need to visit a website such as mrskin.com and choose a video of your liking.

To strengthen the bond with your partner, watch the videos together. You should note that different people have different tastes, so choose a video that is appealing to both of you.

Have a sexy reminiscent session.

When a couple talks about their past sexual experiences, it can lead to sexy pre-play and erotic energy. So you should try it out.

Talking about your past sexual memories with your partner will help you get closer to them, which has been shown to help build up your libido.

Share your fantasies

Besides talking about your best sexual experiences, you should also consider sharing with your partner about your sexual fantasies that you might have.

Fantasies help you figure out who you are and prepare your body and mind for sexual excitement.

When you share fantasies, you also help your partner to understand you better.

Most people will share their fantasies and stop there. Don’t do this. Instead, you should try and help your partner fulfill these fantasies.

For example, if your partner has always wanted sex on the balcony or in a public area with a high risk of getting caught, you should help them bring this fantasy to reality.

Try erotic meditation

Most people have tried meditating, but most have never tried erotic meditation. Since new things are exciting, this exercise is a great way to get closer to your partner and spice things up at the same time.

You need to invite your partner to join you in a quiet and private place. You should then close your eyes and pay attention to your breath as you start to meditate.

Take note of your breath and begin to slow it down on purpose. Next, picture a romantic moment with your partner.

Once you are done, reflect on changes and perceptions about your partner. It’s also wise to talk to your partner about your experience and compare your feelings.

Try mutual masturbation

Most people will masturbate when they don’t have a partner, but you can always try it together to spice up your relationship.

Mutual masturbation happens when you and your partner both do it at the same time. You touch each other and show how much you want pleasure.

It has been shown that watching your partner enjoy sexual pleasure can make you want to be with them more and feel closer to them. So, try it.